Time shifts between what is and what was and I feel stunned. There are no snapshot-like memories of Katie, just an awareness that when I was here each day, she was here too. An intensity of connection beyond sensory memory draws me back to who we used to be. Now there is a Katie shaped hole in the world.
There's no time for memories as I move from one classroom to another every half hour throughout the morning. Breaking the present into so many pieces, each in a different room with a different teacher and students, seems to have made it easy for the past to reach into the present. Moving through spaces that held the four of us for so many years of togetherness makes some moments feel like the present moment has been pulled back into the past.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
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